It all started over seven years ago….seven years and two months to be precise. It was then that my son was born and my breast feeding journey began.
It has been a beautiful, growth-filled journey and there is so much mixed emotion as I write this entry because now the journey has come to a close. Or perhaps it has just opened the next door…..Kahlil breastfed for over 3½ years. He was the type of child that would have been happy to stay connected to the breast night and day and as my instincts led me to follow his cues, he nursed any time in any place.
I was very open and willing to tandem breastfeeding when my daughter Kamala was born. I had read the books and talked with mothers about having a toddler and infant breastfeeding and I was open to the experience. Kahlil nursed all through pregnancy and was still nursing when Kamala was born.
However, mind and body are not always in sync and when Kamala was born and Kahlil went to breastfeed every inch of my body said no and he was weaned over the next few months with surprising ease considering how connected he was to the breast before. Kamala was an avid breast feeder as well.
Kahlil would ask direct “I want BREAST” but Kamala came up with her own terms “Ilk mommy” as opposed to "Milk" which came with cereal or in a cup. She too nursed almost anywhere but we have surprisingly few pictures of that. Her weaning came with its many challenges. But when it came to the point where I was really done and really not interested in more and I started putting the appropriate boundaries in place, the last transition seemed easy and it is amazing to me that now my breasts are finished with their true purpose. The milk is starting to dry and the boobs are starting to get shrinkish and saggish. And I am eternally grateful!!!
This entire journey has been a blessing and has connected me to myself, my function, my role, my purpose. I was the first of any of my friends, peers and family (cousins) to enter into the realm of motherhood and since the time of conception with Kahlil I have felt a deep, guttural connection to this world of pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding. This calling and our lifestyle has meant that I had the blessing of having a birth with a midwife, of breastfeeding each child for 3½ years and of being home with them full time. These things have not been easy at all times by any means! And it has been the perfect thing for me. I am so grateful for all the amazing people it has brought into my life and for all the doors it has opened for me. And now I am in wonder of what lies ahead knowing that this phase of MY life is over but my connection is still as strong as ever. I watch each pregnant woman with wonder and I am excited for the day where I get to be in more direct contact with these women and be part of their path as they walk through their journey. What a gift, what a blessing!!!
